#but only because I recognized i hadn't felt what I thought I'd been feeling at the time

[seraphsfire]

///ARCANE s2 finale SPOILERS ///

LONG POST

SO. THAT VIKTOR ARCANE LEAGUEOFLEGENDS GUY HUH.

some observations that are my personal opinion and/or interpretation of viktor's transformation and physical state. (my screenshots, idc if u repost them or whatever just don't say they're yours, etc)

minor edit: added a sentence i could've sworn i'd written that i hadn't and so my paragraph made no sense lol

love love love the aspects of body horror and character design going on with viktor's post-sourdough-starter cyborg body here, so i was trying to get a better look at it to maybe sort of figure out how his body was transformed, and what it's made of now (metal, magic, a third secret thing, idk)

so it looks like, in general, his skeletal structure and the metal parts in his back brace and his leg brace were fused together and then fused *into* his musculoskeletal structure, not just sort of copied by the hexcore. You can see here he has actual bolts in his spine before he got robot-ified, and to me it seems like this could have been a way for his brace to hook or snap onto his spine more securely to give him extra support.

I think the circles in the middle of the brace over his sternum might have also snapped into bolts in his chest, and you can see them better here

the cloth and leather parts of the brace have either dissolved or been turned into metal.

--I just want to take a side note here to note what im sure other ppl have mentioned but I haven't seen talked much about at least recently, is that viktor's disability wasn't just his mobility issues and bad respiratory health, that he must have been in terrible pain to have a procedure as extreme as bolts being put into his spine and/or chest deemed necessary / beneficial to his quality of life.

In the scene where he tries to destroy the hexcore, he can barely push himself up, and it takes all of his strength to lift a stool over his head that's only a few pounds :(

He later asks jayce to destroy the hexcore because he can't, and ive seen most people interpret that as him not wanting to destroy his life's work, but i always viewed it as him not physically being able to--the hexcore was too strong, and it snapped out at him and knocked him over just at the threat of him destroying it.

That circles over to another thing i thought was interesting, is that when he comes out of the goop he still seems very weak and unstable, even though he now has his back brace and leg brace fused to his skeleton. He still has to use his crutch to walk toward jayce and make effort to straighten his legs, because they're still twisted. It makes me wonder if the hexcore didn't so much heal him as dull his sense of pain so he couldn't feel it, and its energy forced him to move.

That's something i thought was interesting, and it made me think of his line about not feeling cold--he then says he feels something that is exactly how I'd describe coldness to somebody who's never felt it before, it just seems like now, his nervous system doesn't process it in the same way as he used to recognize the sensation of coldness. Interestingly, he still describes it as "unpleasant"

back to the design of viktor's body: what exactly is it made of? Here's where the body horror aspect of it comes in, because i think there's a possibility that's still mostly his body and what we're seeing here is exposed, preserved muscle fiber, because the hexcore either burned or melted off his skin or it literally rotted away while he was in the goop. There's a few artsy little flourishes from the hexcore magic peeking through, but except for the slightly darker color, it looks eerily like how muscle fiber on preserved cadavers looks, down to the way the little filamenty veins are. Granted it could just be a metallic structure the hexcore created, visually mimicking human muscle structure. Or the sourdough starter could have been something super gross like magic sentient cosmic energy formaldehyde--that also makes sense to me because of how when his hair grew out some of the tips had lost color, like they'd been bleached.

anyway the visual aspect of his resurrected hexcore appearance that makes me think of a reanimated cadaver most was how strange and unsettling i found it that he's completely gray and glowing with purple sparks, is that for some reason he's still got a bellybutton and almost a normal skin-like surace to that part of his stomach.

On the other hand, his hip socket and the rest of his pelvis is bony and skeletal. You can kind of see his pelvis not being attached with muscle fiber to his hip socket in that lower corner, it looks the same atp as when he's in his cosmic form.

the jokes about "jayce hugged him with his whole ______ out!!!!" just make me sad bc obviously any extraneous soft tissue was completely obliterated, (I say obviously but idk how many ppl literally believe they were censoring human body parts here.)

Like, he doesn't even have fingernails anymore. The only reason he has a stomach still is because abdominal muscles are a skeletal support structure.

That gives the he heebie jeebies so good, honestly, and what an fascinating choice by the design team instead of giving him idk, age of ultron steel robot shaped abs, which i've seen a lot in like human--robot transformations, he's this horrifying mix of petrified/preserved cadaver tissue, magic metal, and sentient cosmic energy. (Even more tragic and sad if you think about it that way and that jayce might have been hugging his dead friend's preserved, skinned corpse)

the "reanimated corpse" idea fits into the interpretation that viktor's emotions and thoughts are still his, but they've been very dulled by the power of the hexcore, because a reanimated cadaver body isn't going to be able to work as effeciently that way anymore.

or idk maybe the idea that he was still sort-of there, faintly is one i like because it makes me feel better, i can at least pretend some part of him felt comforted being held in such a horrific situation. had to post this screenshot bc that sad little face when hes getting hugged is destroying me

Anyway. many thoughts, many feelings, many possibilities and interpretations. Do with this what you will. I, for instance, will be walking into the sea and never returning probably

[purplesaline]

I don't think grief ever lessens or gets easier to bear any more than a 50lb weight gets lighter or easier to carry.

What changes is our capacity to carry the weight.

When people say, about tried, "It will get easier with time" it doesn't mean you'll miss the person/thing any less deeply. It means that by carrying the grief day by day your capacity to carry it will grow and it will feel easier because you've become stronger.

The grief never changes,

We do.

[30somethingautisticteacher]

The drunk woman was relentless, invading Tommy's personal space as he tried to step back. He kept flashing his ring, but either she hadn't noticed or simply didn't care. Tommy glanced at his watch, grateful Evan hadn't arrived yet to see this mess.

"I'm just a poor girl all alone and new to the city," she slurred, pressing closer. "Can you help me get home safely? You can drive me, and then you can come up and I can thank you properly." She traced a finger down his arm. "I'm sure your wife wouldn't mind."

'Okay, she just doesn't care,' Tommy thought, taking a step back.

"I'm sure the bartender would be happy to call a cab for you," he said firmly.

"But you're so big and strong. I would feel so protected," she pouted, swaying slightly.

"I'm flattered, but I'm sure you'll be plenty safe," Tommy said, maintaining his distance. "And my husband won't like you all over me."

"Husband?" the woman spat, her flirtatious demeanor instantly shifting. "Seriously, you're gay?" Her slurred voice dripped with disdain.

It was at that exact moment that Evan appeared.

"Oh, he's very, very gay," Evan said, draping his arms over Tommy's shoulders and pulling him in for a steamy kiss.

"Hi, baby," Tommy said when they broke apart, his earlier tension melting away at his husband's presence.

"You can go now," Evan said dismissively to the woman.

"You're the husband?" she scoffed, looking Evan up and down with obvious judgment. "What a waste."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Evan asked, his voice sharpening. Tommy could feel him tensing up beside him.

"Not worth it, sweetheart," Tommy said softly, squeezing Evan's hand. He knew that tone in his husband's voice - the one that meant someone had struck a nerve.

"No, I want to know," Evan insisted, his jaw set. The playful possessiveness from moments ago had been replaced by something harder, more defensive. "What exactly is being wasted here?"

"Your lifestyle," she sneered, waving her hand dismissively. "Two big, strong, handsome men shacking up together."

"Shacking up?" Evan said, his voice dangerously quiet. The woman had crossed a line, and Tommy knew his husband well enough to recognize when he was about to snap.

"We're not shacking up," Evan continued, holding up his left hand where his wedding ring caught the bar lights. "We're married. Legally married. I walked down an aisle, said vows, signed papers, and promised to love this man for the rest of my life. And you know what? It was the best decision I ever made."

Tommy's heart swelled, watching his husband defend their marriage.

"So no, it's not a waste. What would be a waste is if I pretended to be something I'm not just to make people like you comfortable. Now if you'll excuse us, I'd like to have a drink with my husband."

"You people," the girl said, shaking her head in disgust.

Tommy felt Evan stiffen next to him, ready for another round, but this time Tommy stepped forward. He'd let Evan handle it his way, now it was his turn.

"Ah, 'you people,'" Tommy said, his voice calm but firm. "Let me tell you about 'us people.' My husband and I are first responders. We put our lives on the line every single day for others - including people who think like you do. I spent years hiding who I was because of that kind of hatred, afraid to be myself. But then I finally accepted who I really was, and that opened my heart to the possibility of love. And I found it - real, earth-shattering, life-changing love."

He pulled Evan closer, feeling his husband relax against him. "So the only waste here would be letting people like you make us ashamed of something so beautiful."

Tommy turned away from the woman, effectively dismissing her. "Come on, baby."

The woman slunk away into the crowd, her previous bravado gone.

"You ok, babe?" Evan asked, turning to Tommy with concern.

"Are you kidding?" Tommy said, pulling him closer by his belt loops. "That was extremely sexy watching you tell her off like that. Look how far my little baby bi has come."

"Couldn't have done it without you," Evan said softly.

"You know, I'm actually more hungry than thirsty," Tommy said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Oh, is that so?" Evan replied, a knowing smirk spreading across his face."Well, we should probably do something about that."

"Yeah, we probably better," Tommy said, pulling Evan in for a heated kiss.

When they broke apart, Evan was speechless. He shook his head. "But not here."

"Right, right, let's get out of here."

They stumbled out of the bar together, Tommy tugging Evan along by their joined hands. Their laughter mixed with the night air, any trace of anger long forgotten replaced by the joy of just being together.

[surielstea]

Bloody Besottedness

Eris Week, day six: AU (vampire)

Pairing: Vampire!Eris Vanserra x Human!Reader

Summary: During a blood shortage, reader can’t help but feel inclined to share her precious blood to the male who had only ever been kind to her.

Warnings: Mostly fluff | slight NSFW | Blood | Blood drinking | Descriptions of blood and very tame gore | dry humping (?)

A. Note: Vampre Eris has been living in my head rent free as of late and I thought I might share to get the rest of you addicted 😈

5.3k words.

Eris paced the hall back and forth, antsy in his movements as he continued to pass by me, then pivoted with a sharp turn, passed by me again, then repeated. This went on for what felt like hours as I sat there, doing nothing but trying to think of solutions for our situation.

We had been low on blood supply for the past month, the vampire I was living with foolishly did not tell me and I had been oblivious until he told me last week that we were officially out, and completely ran dry.

The whole town was in a shortage, the human lands off limits and penalized by death if a vampire were to seek them out as prey. But it was winter and the animals were in hiding. It was a wonder how it ever got this bad, but there were greedy males out there, and they took more than what was deserved.

The royals had more than others by fault, so by the time Eris had run out it meant we were truly arid as in, even the last of the deer in the forest had been hunted down and were long gone by now.

Vaughn, one of Eris's kinder brothers, and Cat, Vaughn's lover came in through the large double doors with panicked expressions and a paler-than-usual complexion.

"Oh gods, not you guys too," I stand to greet them but Eris merely continues his pacing, not paying them any mind.

"How long has it been since you ran out?" I say, crossing my arms over my chest anxiously.

"This morning, you?" Catalina questions. I look back to Eris and his unrelenting pace, like if he stopped he wouldn't know what to do with himself.

"Last week," I murmured and Cat audibly gasped, Vaughn was staying eerily quiet. "Why haven't you hunted anything?" She asks urgently, her eyes alight with both concern and rage.

"He didn't want to leave me alone while we're on a shortage like this, and he didn't want me going out either," I explain. Vaughn examines me, truly looking at me with a glaze over his eyes, displaying an emotion I didn't recognize. "Hey, Vaughn are you okay?" I reach out towards him but he grabs my wrist, gripping it hard before I can make contact with him. "Vaughn," I grit out. A low growl sounds in the base of his throat as I attempt to pry him off. "Vaughn," Catalina strikes him in the side and his hold around my wrist loosens, he blinks once, twice, looks at both of us then notices the red marks around my wrist. "Oh gods, I'm so sorry," He immediately lets go, pulling his hand to his chest like he's just committed something wretched.

I'd be lying if I said I hadn't just been terrified of his nails piercing my skin. Who knows what what three hungry vampires might do to a human who started bleeding, even if they were my friends.

"We're going to go find some food, we'll bring you back whatever we can," Cat smiled at me reassuringly even though I knew she was just as hungry as the male beside her. I can only nod silently in reply. "Try and talk to him," She nods towards Eris. "He'll listen to you." Then she grabbed Vaughn by the wrist like he had mine, and pulled him out the door to go shoot down the largest animal they could find, with our luck, it'd be a rabbit.

I turn back to the red-head still pacing the hall like a madman, a starved man rather. "Eris," I begin as he passes by me. He puts his palm up toward me, telling me not to speak— not because he wouldn't listen, but because if he did he knew he'd be persuaded by whatever I have to say.

"I know my weaknesses so just, don't," He warns, then returns to his pacing. Despite our situation, I couldn't help but feel flustered by that.

I sigh and sink back into the chaise, my eyes following him as he goes back and forth across my view. I sit there in the silence of his footsteps. I was in my fourth position on the chaise before I got fed up and stood, walking into the pathway he's retraced hundreds of times now. "Eris," I warn before he can ram into me. He stops one pace away. "I'm going to make dinner, you need to eat," I explain.

"I can't," He sighs. We've tried, it was true. Even the meat he can barely get down without a drink of blood to go with it.

"It's better than nothing," I sigh. "Cat and Vaughn will be back with some for you in a few hours just, try and eat what I make alright?" I take a step closer and he matches it with a step back. "I'm not going to hurt you," I sigh in a reassuring tone and he shakes his head.

"No, I'm afraid I might hurt you," He confesses and my caring demeanor falters.

Oh.

I was so mindless that it hadn't even occurred to me that he'd be capable, he'd been telling me about how dangerous it was to be near a hungry vampire for months, and yet when it came to him that thought immediately voided, because, it was him. "You won't," I steel my features.

"You don't know that," He whispers like he's done it before, hurt me before, fed on me before. "Your smell it's, it's everywhere," He looks around as if he might be able to see it.

"My, smell?" I tilt my head. I knew vampire senses were much stronger than those of humans, but could he truly smell people?

"Gods, it's heavenly darling," He sighs, my scent seeming to be suffocating him.

"Is there any way I can control it?" I offer taking another step forward and this time he matches it again, doesn't let me come near, and doesn't indulge that restless hunger growing inside of him. He shakes his head with a soft whine, backing up against the wall forcefully so he doesn't pounce.

"I'm sorry, Eris," I back away, going towards the kitchen. "They'll be back soon, I'll make food— I know it's not what you want but, it's better than nothing okay?" I mumble. He only nods, afraid of opening his mouth, afraid his teeth will somehow find their way into my neck if he responds. So he kept it sealed shut and only stared longingly from the end of the hall.

I disappear into the kitchen and only a moment later, the sound of his pacing returns.

I hum a soft tune, a lullaby my mother used to sing for me at night, knowing it so well that I could get through every lilt and swing of the melody without so much as a stumble.

The food I had prepared wasn't gourmet by any means, it was a quickly thrown-together plate of chicken, broccoli, and potatoes. Chicken blood is the cheapest at the markets, easy to source, and rancid to taste. But it got the job done so I drained as much of it as I could from the bird, after filtering it I only came up with about a cup, drinkable but not enough.

There were barely any nutrients in chicken's blood, a whole gallon wouldn't be enough to feed a male like Eris.

Human blood, however, a drop could satiate the average child, which meant a cup like this would leave Eris satisfied for at least another week, just until the shortage was over.

I debated it. Wondered if I could spare just a few drops into the cup, give him just enough to keep him from going over the edge, and reward him for all the restraint he's had. But I'm quickly reminded of why he has that restraint, he's not only keeping himself from crossing that boundary but he is also keeping me alive. If a vampire was feeding on a human, then the human's survival rate quickly became slim. The venom of their teeth left us defenseless, meant to be pliable and lithe, turned into this shell of skin, meant for the blood in our veins alone. The effects depend on the human, some pass out, some become incapable of thinking, and some even become aroused. I didn't know which one I was, and I wasn't in the business of finding out.

It wasn't just the venom of their teeth, but that blood soon became the vampire's sole craving until they could no longer satiate it, until the source for it was gone and they had to find a new victim. If Eris had gotten a taste I fear his control would shatter and he'd become like Vaughn, a glossy-eyed predator who wants nothing more than to feed.

But if he didn't know, if I could slip a few drops in, would it be that harmful? All signs were pointing to yes but I was desperate to help him.

I sighed in contemplation, then ultimately decided that to give him even a few drops I'd have to make an incision somewhere in my skin, which any vampire in a mile radius would be capable of smelling, it was luck that Eris had sent the cooks and the guards home last week for the rest of the shortage.

So I didn't give him any, forced myself to watch him suffer for a few more hours until Cat and Vaughn returned.

"Food's ready Eris," I peek my head down the hall. He was sat on the chaise, his head in his hands as he muttered something to himself.

Gods I was worried about him, beyond worried.

I walk closer, still keeping my distance. "Eris," I call again. He doesn't move but his muttering stops which relieves a small part of my unease. I knew I shouldn't have though I couldn't help but step that final stretch between us, crouching down in front of him and placing a hand on his shoulder. "Eris?" I call and his head snaps up with a snarl, baring his very sharp, very deadly teeth at me. I scramble back in both shock and fear, leaning back on my hands with apprehension creasing my brows.

His eyes were glossy, his nose twitching, those signs of craving I should've been recognizing. "Eris," I whisper and he blinks, the sheen over his eyes disappearing with that movement.

"No, no, I'm so, so sorry," He sighs out like he's let himself down more than me, he moves to the floor where I still sat, fear still lingering in my gaze as he comes closer.

"It's fine," I say before he can get too close. "Dinner's on the table, I'll be in my room if you need me," I murmur, standing up and brushing off my dress.

"Darling," Pleads, his tone wobbling, his eyes glassy. Not with desire, with regret. He was the depiction of apology, on his knees with his hands in his lap as his eyes shone with sincerity.

"They'll be back soon, we can talk after, I promise," Once he was no longer a threat, we would talk.

"I'm sorry," He whispers and even from a hallway away I can hear the despair in his voice. My heart crumbles at the sight, but I know better than to give in, so instead I mutter my reply,

"Me too." Then I pivot on my heel and retreat into my bedroom.

I told him to find me if he needed to, I knew he wouldn't seek me out, even though I desired to see him despite his state of starvation. I knew better than anyone it was dangerous, and learned from past vampiric lovers that it was nearly impossible to live in harmony with each other. They always end up asking for a taste, just a drop, until it turns into something more. I never let them bite me, never.

Once I had been on the lap of my boyfriend-at-the-time, and his teeth brushed over my neck, about to sink in. It was too close of a call. He apologized profusely but in the end, he knew I wasn't safe with him any longer, and he let me go.

I haven't been with a vampire since. I hadn't planned on catching feelings for Eris, yet it wasn't something I could control. It was a feral beast that couldn't be caged no matter the strength of the obstacles. It persisted and fought, then came out without a scar or scratch on it. Untamed and wild.

I was curled into a ball in my bed that was all too large for my body, made for elegant, long limbs I didn't hone.

After an hour of lying with my thoughts, I heard the front double doors open to the frigid cold, wind howling and racking against the windows. Catalina and Vaughn must've returned. I didn't get up to greet them. I could hear the muffle of their voices echoing from down the hall and that was enough.

I couldn't pick out any words, just a slow conversation. Catalina did most of the talking. When vampires fed it was loud, it was messy nauseating, and gruesome. I heard none of it. The duo didn't stay for long, they were in and out within fifteen minutes. Which terrified me. Could they not find anything when hunting? That thought hadn't even occurred to me until now.

I scrambled out of bed and marched right into the sitting room where an empty glass sat on the coffee table, only a few drops sat at the bottom, the remnants of what he'd already drank.

Eris sat on the sofa, his head tilted back with his hands over his face. If he knew I was near he didn't show it. "It'll be dawn soon, you should get some rest," I mutter, his hands leave his face and he looks at me lazily. "Did they bring any more?" I look at the empty glass, the remains showing it was only a quarter full.

"No," He replies blandly.

"What if—" I step closer.

"No," He immediately shuts down.

"You don't even know what I was going to say!" I cross my arms with a pout. "I'm not stealing your blood and that is final," He rules.

"It's not stealing if I'm offering," I mumble stubbornly beneath my breath sourly. A small smile pulls at the corners of his mouth.

"That's my girl," He drones, a smirk playing at his lips, with a familiar snarky tone. It felt nice to be back, even if he only got a quarter cup of blood, I didn't want to know which animal it was from. I didn't ask.

"I trust you, Eris," I confess and the word feels foreign on my tongue. Trust. It sent a shiver down my spine, I was taught not to feel that way about anyone, especially not a vampire. Yet here I was, ready to bear my soul to him. "I trust you enough to control yourself," I continue and he opens his mouth to protest but I speak before he can, "I'm begging you, I hate— I hate seeing you like this." We both ignore the stumble of my words, the situation too earnest to hold his usual witty remarks and sly smirks.

"Did you at least drink the chicken blood? Eat any dinner?" I ask when he doesn't reply, only stares at me.

"I ate as much as I could," He reassured. Which told me he had at least a few bites of everything.

"And the blood?" I propped my hands on my elbows like a disappointed mother.

"I drank it," He frowned. "Tasted like the south end of a damned Naga hound," He uttered bitterly and I giggled, a smile spreading over my face because he was back, joking and teasing. "C'mere," He beckons me closer.

My smile fades as I settle over his lap, straddling his hips as he adjusts beneath me, hands on my thighs and I realize it's not to brace me but to put me in control, to push me away if he needs to.

"You're sure about this, sunshine?" He asks.

"It won't hurt, will it?" I whisper and his eyes soften.

"Only a pinch, then the venom will settle in and you'll barely feel a thing," He reassured. I swallow thickly. "I need you to be sure about this," He raises his brows a fraction, stressing his words. I simply nod. "Words, love, use your words," He urges. I swallow down my fear. I'm in control.

"I'm sure, I trust you," I say and his eyes soften, then blaze with desire. Not uncontrolled like Vaughn, but unfiltered need like he's experienced it before he was even starving.

He reaches up to my bare thigh, where the slit of my nightgown was and he pulls my dagger from its holster wrapped around my thigh. "If I don't stop in the first five minutes, use this okay?" He hands me the wooden-bladed dagger. My hand shakes when I take it from him.

"Okay?" He repeats.

"Okay," I nod in a rushed manner.

His hands are warm as he moves my hair to one side of my shoulders, the pane of my neck completely bare, my clavicle, my collarbone, and my cleavage all laid out on display by the immodesty of my slip dress. "You're safe," His breath fanned over my neck and I nodded, believing everything that those two words meant.

He didn't bite, instead, his first touch to my skin was a soft brush of his lips, a kiss. It was sweet and innocent, and the feel of it reminded me of that ex-boyfriend, the one who had come so close to biting me, and now I was offering it to another.

His lips linger over my pulse point before they seal along the skin, his tongue flattening to the area before the prod of his fangs, then the incision. His bite was slow and gentle, I felt my warm blood stream from my neck and as soon as the crimson ichor met his tongue he let out an involuntary groan, his mouth working wonders over my throat.

He had been right, it didn't hurt, it had been delectable as if I was the one feeding off of it.

I thought for a moment that I'd pass out when the venom set in, or my mind would shut off entirely and I'd become a husk, but as his tongue lapped at the red and his teeth dug deeper I found myself letting out soft gasps of pleasure, telling me that I was the third and rarest option, the one of arousal.

I smiled at the realization. I didn't want to pass out, I didn't want to lose thought, I wanted to experience this, feel this, bathe in this.

Gods I hadn't expected it to feel so good or I would've done it sooner, would've given him every drop— oh, gods this venom is powerful. I can barely keep my grip on the dagger.

"Eris," I whine out and he continues to drink, his tongue running over the expanse of my neck greedily. I didn't want him to stop, I never wanted this to end.

The dagger tumbled from my hold, my hand in favor of going into his amber hair, my other hand on his jaw as I threw my head back, giving him even better access. Wanted him deeper, wanted him nestled inside of me, wanted every inch of him. I sighed out his name yet again and he met it with a groan of immense pleasure.

He reached for the wooden blade, forcing it back into my hands because even beyond his hazy mind of arousal, he still put my safety above all else.

I grind down over his hips, feeling the hardness in his pants that developed as soon as he tasted me. Was he aroused too? Did he feel the burn in his heart too?

My hands ached to be on his skin, I unbuttoned his shirt with fast hands, palms flattening against his abdomen once I got the white dress shirt off of him. My fingers slide into every crevice of his chest, the muscles of his arms, and the grooves of his back. But by the Mother, I needed more, needed all of him.

Slowly, so slowly, he lifted from my neck. His teeth left my throat licked clean save for the two slits from his canines. I panted, continuing to wind my hips over him in pure lust.

His lips were stained with my blood, a drop cascading from the corner of his mouth but I didn't care, I crashed my mouth onto him and he returned it with a fierce force.

Everything about him was warm and comforting, his large hands roaming my waist, my hips, my thighs. His lips felt like heaven and the metallic taste of myself on his tongue made me entirely feral. He was an expert with his tongue, exploring my mouth with it like he had to memorize the feel as if he might never get the chance again. I couldn't help but imagine what it'd feel like to have his tongue in other places. I continued to rut my hips over his hardened length, earning that friction I craved just as much as he craved my blood.

My legs quivered as he gripped my bare thigh, past the empty holster and up into my flimsy dress. His fingers slipped beneath the elastic of my panties, holding my bare hip in place, and stopped me from rocking them back and forth. The way he kissed was all-consuming, taking everything from me in just a kiss, it was carnivorous and robbing, he took and took and all I could do was give, all I wanted to do was give. I would've shoved my heart down his throat if he didn't take it.

But then he pulled back and when I chased he gripped my hip tightly in warning, restraining me.

"You're influenced by the venom," He panted and I frowned.

"I want you," I murmured and his grip loosened, but stayed at my hip, a threat.

"The venom is telling you that," He sighs as I slump into his shoulder. "You're intoxicated too, aren't you? That means we both wrongfully consent," I murmur.

"That logic makes no sense— and I'm not intoxicated," He defends. I crease my brows dumbly. He was hard beneath me, I knew that for a fact, and he had just been kissing me like it was all he's ever wanted. So what did he mean?

"I need you," I sigh into the shell of his ear and he shivers at the words.

"I know, I know, my love there are chapter books of things I want to do to you but not tonight, not like this," He refuses and I frown, kissing up the side of his neck, my tongue brushing over the spot that he bit into on my neck, his pulse much slower than mine.

"Let's get you into bed, alright?" He says, his voice is soft.

"I don't want to leave you," I whine, wrapping my arms tighter around him. "Can I sleep in your bed tonight?" I murmur like a child afraid of the dark, asking to crawl in with her parents.

He sighs. "You mean my coffin?" He mutters and I giggle, kissing up his neck with pure adoration, the sensuality of it all voiding and being replaced by pure affection and soft intimacy.

"You're so funny, 'Ris," I murmur.

"Gods, that venom truly did a number on you didn't it?" He taunts and I incoherently nod my head, continuing my kisses that traveled up his neck.

"Alright fine, you can sleep in my bed tonight," He sighs and I all but cheer, clinging to him tighter with a wide smile as he stands up, cradling me from beneath my thighs and striding off to the end of the hall where his bedroom had lied in this sprawling complex of a mansion.

He laid me in the enormous bed first, the curtains cracked just enough to show the sunrise peering through the drapes. He shuts the sunlight out, leaving us in darkness then slipping in beside me, keeping his distance.

I pout, and without control over my better judgment, I scoot closer, throwing my leg over his torso and my arm around his shoulders. "Cuddle me, please," I whine and he chuckles, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling my chest into his. "Can you kiss me?" I test my luck.

"No," He immediately replies, his voice assertive and only making me giggle. 

"You sure?" I croon, my nose brushing against his as he looks down at me with a soft smile before groaning out, "How long is that venom supposed to last? I miss it when you would threaten me," He sighed, but the smile on his face spoke for itself.

"You kissed me earlier, what's so different now?" I persisted.

"Will you go to sleep if I do?" He prompts and I nod, I'd do anything for that kiss.

"Just one, please Eris," I beg and his eyes soften.

"You're going to kill me in the morning," He sighs, then leans down and places a gentle, reluctant kiss on my wanting lips and the taste of him satiates the unrelenting hunger in the pit of my stomach. When he backs away he doesn't let me ask for another and instead pushes my face into the crook of his neck and props his chin atop my head. “Sleep. Now,” He commands and I only sigh in contentment.

The morning came late. I must've slept through half the day. But the male behind me hadn't so much as shifted, even if he'd been up for hours, he stayed, not wanting me to wake up alone.

His arm was around my waist and his breathing was at its normal steady and slow pace, comforting. His chest was warm against my back and his thumb was caressing over the bite mark he had left last night, already a scar.

"Good morning 'Ris," I murmured through a yawn, and his thumb halted against my skin in slight shock.

"I thought you'd never wake up," He mumbles. "That would've been preferred than waking up next to you," I toss.

"There’s my girl," He sighs in relief. "I missed you," He murmured, pressing a kiss over my fresh scar. I turn slightly, hand coming to the back of his neck, looking up into his eyes. The color returned to his face, the glaze over his eyes wasn't one of hunger but rather adoration.

"I missed you too," I mutter, beyond happy to have him back.

"We didn't uh… did we?" I flush bashfully and he rolls his eyes dramatically.

"It hurts that you think you wouldn't already be aware," He grumbles as a smirk tugs at my lips.

"Maybe you didn't make it very memorable?" I hum and he glares at me because we both knew that Eris Vanserra couldn't do anything that wasn't memorable. Especially not sex.

"No, we didn't freak the sheets if that's what you're asking," He moves his hand from your waist and flips onto his back, fingers lacing behind his head, turning away from me.

"You seem disappointed," I observe, flipping on top of him as if he were a second mattress, nestling into his chest.

"We kissed," He muttered, he thought it was best if I knew.

“I remember," I reassured. "And I remember asking for one, and being the gentleman you are you said no, then gave in because I wouldn't shut up," I giggle into the crook of his neck. He peeks one eye open.

"You think I'm a gentleman?" He mumbles. I nod with a tight smile. "That's sweet of you to say sunshine, but unfortunately you've confused me with someone else," He sighs like he's disappointed with the lie that slips from his lips.

"Impossible, I've known you from the moment I met you," I say pulled me up higher, my face hovering above his while my legs sprawled and intertwined with his.

"Yeah? And what’s that?" He arched a brow. I nod, biting into my lower lip.

"A gentleman," I murmur, moving past him and snuggling my head into the crook of his shoulder.

"Is that venom still affecting you?" He asks as I cling to him.

"No," I mumbled. "I just missed you," I explain.

We lay there in silence for a moment, his hand tracing soothing circles on my back as I ran my hand through his fiery red hair.

"What are we going to do when you begin to starve again?" I ask and he sighs, not wanting to think about it.

"We're going to have to go out hunting— I'm afraid the others are going to think you’re prey just as well," He explains. They would. Vampires didn't care who I belonged to, even if it was their lord, I was still fresh blood, and the most craved type at that.

"How many times can you bite me until I turn?" I knew the answer, but I wanted him to know I'd do it again, and that I still felt safe around him.

"On the third bite you'd be turned, which means we can only do this once more," He explains.

"But I don't want to, you're a last resort— you're not even a resort unless you choose to be. Do you understand me?" He stresses.

"Mhm," I nod, clinging to him tighter. "I heard that vampires crave the human they bit until they drain them," I murmur.

"Or they die," He adds.

"So, do you crave me right now?" I ask.

"Your scent is stronger,” He shrugs. but maybe it's because I'm still full it's not affecting me." He adds.

"We should probably go hunting before you start to starve again, how long do you think your fill will last?" I question. "And don't lie to me this time, tell me the truth Eris," I instruct and he huffs.

"Probably by the end of the week, I'll need to feed again," he explains. "So we should go soon, make sure we're prepared if it comes earlier," I plan and he nods.

"Just lay here with me for a moment, don't worry so much about the future right now," He breathes out, tightening his arms around me.

"I can't help it, I'm a mere mortal time is limited," I remind and his smile falters, as if remembering that in the blink of an eye, I'll be old and withered away. He's lived ten times my lifetime, and seen more than I could ever dream of. "You're so old," I grumble and a smile pulls at his lips. "Just stop aging, let me catch up," I mumble.

"I stopped aging hundreds of years ago," He says pointedly and I seal my lips shut because I suppose he was right. "But it's true, I have tattoos older than you princess," He hums and I grin up at him. "Why does that make you smile?" He asks and I shrug.

"I like your tattoos," I say, my hand coming up to his bicep where a dark maroon ink trailed up his arm, tracing my fingertip along the delicate lines. "They're pretty," I mumble and it was his turn to smile.

"Just like me," He says and I roll my eyes, looking at him— he wasn't wrong.

It was no secret that vampires were beautiful beyond belief, but gods this male blew everyone else out of the water.

"You are," I agree because there was no viable way I could argue he wasn't.

His grin widens and I flick my eyes down to that smile, those lips that had been on mine last night, those pointed canines that I allowed to sink into my neck. The same ones I would happily let bite me again.

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[honeygrahambitch]

"No witnesses then?" Will asked as he entered Jack's office with Hannibal closely behind him.

Jack looked defeated. The whiskey bottle on his desk was the proof. He was probably waiting to call it a day and drown his frustration into a glass of whiskey.

"There is a witness. We brought him in but by the time we will interrogate him, our serial killer will have committed three other crimes."

"May I ask why we are not interrogating him now?" Hannibal asked.

"We need a translator. He doesn't speak English. Took the Bureau a few hours only to find one and he can make it here in a few days."

"What does he speak then? There's a high chance Hannibal speaks it." Will commented.

"I don't speak every language on earth, darling."

"I don't speak Lithuanian."

"Lithuanian?" Jack inquired.

"Aren't you Lithuanian, doctor?" Will asked.

"I am but I haven't spoken it in years. I doubt I can be of any help."

"So be it, then."

"Doctor." Jack started. Will and Hannibal recognized Jack's persuasive voice and Will immediately regretted opening his mouth. There was no way out now. "It would be of great help if we got the physical features of our killer. I am only asking you to try. It's the only way I will be able to sleep at night."

Hannibal looked at Will, then at Jack.

-

Jack and Will watched Hannibal from behind the glass of the interrogation room.

Hannibal spoke fluently with only few hesitations. There was something else that Will couldn't point towards. He felt bad about making Hannibal help with the case. When he had said he couldn't speak Lithuanian, Will knew he wasn't being modest about his skills. He had said that just because he hadn't wanted to speak Lithuanian.

Will detected some sort of awkwardness from Hannibal in the first few minutes but he masked it well. The discussion went smoothly.

Jack was nodding pleased.

"And he was saying he can't do it." Jack commented, paying so much attention to what was happening in front of them that one could think he was understanding every word. "We might catch this one by tonight, Will."

"Hopefully."

And they did. A bit later than what Jack had expected but Hannibal's report had been of great use.

-

"You caught him." Will said as the doctor was pouring him a glass of wine.

"You and Jack did."

"We wouldn't have without your help. It made a difference."

Hannibal said nothing, which was unusual and which reminded Will of his earlier eerie feeling.

"I'm sorry about making you do it. I figured you weren't comfortable."

"You didn't make me do anything. You know how persuasive Jack can get."

"How was it?" He wasn't sure wether Hannibal would want to talk about it.

"Quite an experience, I'd say. Words I have not pronounced in years. I might have made a lot of mistakes. Good thing you and Jack couldn't tell."

"It was more than a skill issue. Words have their way of taking you to certain places. And his accent was extremely authentic."

Will smiled softly. "I am sure your Lithuanian skills are better than mine."

Hannibal brought his glass of wine to his lips and smelled it thoughtfully.

"It took you down the halls of your memory palace."

"And it opened some locked doors."

"Did you manage to close them back already?"

"Not yet. I might linger in there for a while."

Will grabbed his fork and played with the sushi roll that was resting on his plate.

"It's something he said before leaving the interrogation room. He asked me why I can speak Lithuanian. I told him that I am, in fact, Lithuanian. He was very surprised by that. He said I didn't sound Lithuanian at all." Hannibal explained and took a sip from his glass.

"You don't have to keep to yourself." He said, sensing the amount of thoughts running through Hannibal's mind. "What else bothers you?"

"How did that make you feel?" Will asked genuinely curious and was relieved to see Hannibal cracking a smile. He knew Will hated that question.

"For a second it made me question what I am. The place you are born in doesn't define that. Nor does your family, be it dead or alive."

"Then nature and nurture have no power on the individual?"

"I wouldn't choose either. I would have said that they both have a role in defining who we are."

"Implying that you no longer believe that?"

"I kept reflecting on this subject while I was cooking. I didn't come to a satisfying answer. Then you knocked."

"And?"

"And here I was going to say something inappropriate. I can't now that you made this confession."

"And I found all the answers I needed. I see myself in you. And that is more than what Lithuania will ever mean to me. And more than what nature and nurture can explain."

"What was it?"

"Today I learnt that listening to you speaking Lithuanian does certain things to me."

Hannibal put down his fork and knife, his lips slightly parted. He didn't try to hide his surprise.

"Well." He said thoughtfully. "I had made up my mind I would never use it again after today. But this changes everything."

[skyloftian-nutcase]

For your prompts (so excited, and congratulations btw!)- LU:

-Minish Four waking up in someone’s pocket?

-Anesthesia, but also the effects of coming out of it

-Ten year old Time who looks like he’s however old he is, keeping his true age a secret

It felt strangely stuffy.

Four wasn't entirely sure what had happened. He'd gone exploring after people had started settling in for lunch. The four hours of sleep last night hadn't really bothered him initially, but as he'd spoken to the Minish in this area, he'd felt himself start to nod off. He'd thought it was best to get back to camp as soon as he could - only a few people knew about his Minish magic, and he didn't need the group worrying because he'd gone wandering and hadn't returned.

But what had occurred since then? Four recalled the tiny river created from the trickling stream, how it attracted all sorts of creatures. He remembered a finch that had been hopping about excitedly in search for worms. He remembered deciding to settle on a rock and listen to the stream and the birds.

Had he... fallen asleep by accident? Oh, great. He was getting as bad as Sky.

But why did it feel so different now? If he'd fallen asleep, that would have been on the rock.

Something brushed against his face, or, really, had been brushing against his face since he'd awoken. Scrunching his eyes shut a moment, he slowly ran his hands down his face. It was strangely dark, though there was some vague light trying to pierce through his eyelids. But it should have been much brighter.

Oh no. How long had he been asleep?

This was when Four realized that his world was moving.

Four abruptly opened his eyes, finding that he was surrounded in what looked to be a giant blanket. At least that was what he assumed - it was cloth of some sort, but it was shifting rhythmically, and--

Four yelped as something bonked his head, and he looked up to see some strange outline pushing through the blanket. He tentatively pressed on it, and was absolutely bewildered by the hardness of it. What was that, why was the blanket moving, and--

Wait a second. He recognized the patterning on the blue fabric. It looked like what was on Twilight's sash that he wore under his belt.

Sunlight ripped into the sky all of a sudden, and Four looked up, disoriented, to see Twilight peeking at him from the corner.

Did... did he tuck Four into his sash?

"Oh, hey," Twilight said quietly, glancing around before looking back down at him. "I was wondering when you'd wake up."

"What in the--why didn't you just wake me up?" Four asked, simultaneously embarrassed and befuddled.

"Can't hear ya," Twilight replied. "You're too tiny."

"Rancher, I--"

"You were sleeping really peacefully, so I figured I'd just leave you be. But I said I'd look for you, so we're on our way back to the others."

"You'd better take me out, then, because I--"

"I figured I'd just say you were on your way and give you a bit more time to rest."

Four huffed, clawing his way up Twilight's tunic to try and climb out of his little cloth prison. Twilight laughed at him. Laughed.

"What are you doing?" the Ordonian asked, plucking Four easily by the back of his tunic.

Well, at least he was free. Four reversed the magic, feeling himself grow in size, and Twilight yelped.

Maybe he should've picked a better way to do this.

Four found himself gasping as Twilight fumbled to catch him. He was going to land just fine on his feet, but the elder hero thought he needed to still hold him, and now he was in his arms like a small child.

Four felt his face reddening. "I'm not a kid, Rancher!"

"Well, you could warn me," Twilight remarked mildly, plopping him on the ground easily. "I know you didn't sleep well last night, so I didn't want to interrupt. Sorry."

Four sighed. He was used to taking care of himself. Well. They all were used to that. Four was honestly the better team player of the group.

But he was his own team. So he still kind of took care of himself.

Anyway, the point was that... that...

That Twilight was trying to be helpful.

Four sighed yet again. "It's all right."

Twilight smiled easily, elbowing the smaller hero. "How about a ride back to the others, then?"

Four chuckled, taking the offer. "All right, that I can handle."

Twilight transformed easily, allowing Four to climb on his back, and the little hero felt his heart warm as the pair rode through the forest, the cool breeze blowing through his hair.

Four had to admit, he was quite fond of this new team he found himself in.

[lovemyself97]

✦𝓒𝓸𝓷𝓿𝓮𝓷𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓬𝓮 𝓢𝓽𝓸𝓻𝓮 ✦ JJK

Summary: You forgot your wallet and that was a good thing. Saved by a small kind gesture from a stranger, but perhaps not so strange. Pairing: Idol!Jungkook x foreign! female reader. Genre: Fluff Warnings: none (Thoughts are in italics) Author: You can read part 2 here , I hope you like it; There's a short playlist for a better reading experience :) Words: 643

Argh, why Lily?

It was 11 p.m. when I looked at the clock on the gray wall, my dear friend, Lily, a Korean woman I've known since I moved to Seoul, convinced me that she deserved a pot of very spicy ramen for her well-deserved promotion at work... the question is:

1-I forgot my wallet,

2-I was threatened with not being able to enter the apartment without the noodles

3-And now a lady was looking at me visibly annoyed.

'Look, I've always paid you on time and...'

'I don't do cash on delivery,' she muttered to end the conversation. Before I could reply again, a packet of snacks and two cartons of banana milk and the money were placed on the counter and only now I realized that we weren't the only ones there.

A young man was wearing a black mask, dressed head to toe in black, holding a helmet in one hand and looking impatient.

'Pass this and the lady's ramen, please,' he said, incredibly politely, making me let out the breath I hadn't even realized I'd been holding. The lady looked speechless for a moment but just nodded and quickly packed up the items.

Before I could thank him, he quickly left, leaving me alone with that lady, 'I'm never coming back here again' I thought as I tried to catch up with the boy.

'Wait.'

The young man, who was already leaving when I reached him, frowned when he looked at me and something glinted in the reflection of the light. I noticed that he had an eyebrow piercing, but something else caught my eye and left me breathless. He had tattoos on one of his hands, which were very familiar to me… As soon as I looked up, he realized that I recognized him, Jeon Jungkook…

I had always been a fan of Jungkook, admiring his powerful voice and his talent on stage. I never imagined I'd have the chance to meet him like this, so casually, and he probably didn't want to deal with a hysterical fan right now, so I took a deep breath and spoke calmly:

'I wanted to say thank you, thank you so much for helping me and if you could just wait a little while until I pick up-'

'No need to thank me,' he said, his expression softening a little. 'I was just in a hurry and thought I could help.' His voice came out low and muffled because of his helmet, he rummaged through the grocery bag he had just made and handed me one of the cartons of banana milk. 'Just be careful on your way home, it's late.'

I couldn't even open the carton of banana milk he gave me. Instead, I kept it carefully, as a special souvenir of that unexpected encounter.

'Do you always come here?' I asked a little awkwardly, but I couldn't help but be curious and wanted the moment to last a little longer, to which he just winked at me before speeding off on his motorcycle and driving away through the empty streets of Seoul.

I looked around as soon as he was out of sight, feeling a silly grin form on my face, did that really happen?, followed by several shrieks but I soon felt my cheeks heat up with embarrassment, I'm not even dressed up!, I quickly looked at the nearest reflection, a puddle of water, but something else caught my eye, it looked like a wallet, I wonder whose it was?, and my eyes widened as I realized whose it could be.

It seems that he had forgotten his wallet... I went home thinking about how I would return it to its owner and thinking that maybe I would go to that convenience store more often.

I had no idea I'd run into him again sooner than I thought.

[Don't be a silent reader, let me know what you think 💗]

Do not copy. Original work of @lovemyself97 , 2/10/2024 (reblogging always helps! )

[buggybambi]

yours, cb. | carmen berzatto

summary: carmen writes a letter to you the day before he proposes, reflecting on your relationship.

wc: 1.02k | navigation post

rating: fluff, none! content warnings: none! if any need to be added lmk but as far as i know there are none:-)

“The first time I met you, I was so damn nervous. Richie told me you were back in town and I thought I was convinced that my first time meeting you, I’d screw it up somehow. Jumble all my words, forget my name. I almost did the first time I saw you. That night in the restaraunt with the only light on being one over a table by the fogged up windows. You still look so pretty under that light, you look pretty under anything. Richie told me, ‘she’s sweet’. Sweet doesn’t begin to describe you, angel. My angel.”

"Everything about you was.. so enchanting. I thought you were the prettiest girl I'd ever met. I never thought people could geniuenly fall in love at first sight, but with you, I realize what they're talking about when they say they laid eyes on their partner and they knew. From the moment I saw you I knew you were meant to be mine. And I yours."

You sat in your shared bedroom, your laptop in your lap as you scrolled through the numerous recipes Sydney had sent to you to review for the menu, since apparently you were hired as taste-tester. "What the hell is that?" You murmur to yourself as you stare at one of the dishes.

The front door opens and then swiftly closes, as you can hear footsteps approaching. You close your laptop just as Carmen appears a second later, practically jumping into your arms, laying his head on your chest. "Hi, bear. You okay?" You ask.

He lets out a soft "mm" as you begin running your hand through disheveled curls. "Just thought about you all day. Wanted to be here. That okay?" He checks, lifting his hand. You place a kiss on his head. "Carm, anytime you need, I'm here."

There's that grin again. There's that spike in his heartbeat when he looks at you, when he talks to you. The way he can feel himself falling deeper into love with you, no matter how long you've been together. There's a comfort in that, almost.

───

"The first time I kissed you, you may not have realized this (or you did any you're just too sweet not to say anything which totally sounds like you, babe) but I think my hands would have won an award for being the sweatiest palms, ever. You know when people say they feel fireworks when they kiss the person they love? I always thought they were being dramatic because until you, I hadn't felt that. But now I know what exactly they mean."

When Carmen wakes up and he realizes that you aren't there, he frowns. His favorite thing to do in the mornings when he wakes up before you do - which happens often - is to kiss you on the cheek and snuggle you for a few minutes before he has to pull himself away.

It isn't until he hears you humming down the hallway making your way back in that he smiles, sitting up to greet you. You come in, two mugs of coffee in hand. "Oh, hey, you're awake." You say, setting the mug down on his nightstand, kissing him before slipping back into your side of the bed, setting your coffee down.

Your phone buzzes in between you both, causing you to look down as your lock screen lights up with texts from Nat. "Am I your lockscreen?" He asks, recognizing the photo in the back. You smile at him, nodding. "Of course you are. You're my favorite person, Carm, why wouldn't you be?"

"And then our first date. The night I almost burned my apartment down because I was staring at you while the food cooked. How is it possible since that day you've gotten prettier? Well, I know the answer, it's because naturally you're gorgeous anyway. But each time I stare at you, it takes me back to that night in my apartment. Our apartment, we just had no idea it would become that then."

He kissed you right then, making you forget about Nat blowing up your phone. "You're my favorite person, too." He whispers against your lips as you smile, kissing him again.

───

"It's weird to think about, you know? How I'm going to propose to you tomorrow, and I'm writing this on old notebook paper, and you have no clue. Maybe it's silly of me to be writing this, it'll probably be some forgotten piece of paper. Or I'll read this to our future kids, if we ever have any, and tell them what I thought of their mom the first time I saw her: I was starstruck."

He looks over at you where you sleep, your arms wrapped around his torso where he sits up. He tries to keep still as he writes, not moving too much. He leans down, placing a kiss on the crown of your head.

"I can't wait to ask you to marry me tomorrow. To tell you everything I need to tell you, to ask you to be mine forever until death do us part. Mikey once learned Irish wedding vows (because of course he did), and I think it says what I can't. May you never steal, lie or cheat. But if you must steal, then steal away my sorrows. And if you must lie, lie with me all the nights of my life. And if you must cheat, then please cheat death, because I couldn't live a day without you."

His mind races with every memory he's shared with you. Looking around the bedroom you two share and have had so many laughs, tears and more in. The idea that he - a boy from Chicago with family issues who thinks he's an unlovable psycho - gets to marry you? Share a life with you, and maybe get to be the father of your children?

You're the one for him.

And for the rest of your lives, he doesn't know what he wants to be. But as for as long as you'd have him, he has an idea of what he wants to be.

"Yours, CB."

˙ ✩°˖🌸 ⋆｡˚꩜

thank you for reading! please feel free to engage with this post by reblogging, commenting or sliding into my inbox to leave feedback! i appreciate all of you! check out my nav post here for more fanfics!

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˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

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[fantasticsandwich]

yandere influencer x fem! reader (pt 14)

{tw for coercion}

Even several days after Cillian had transferred the money into your account, you were still trying to process the fact that your brother's tuition was paid in full. You cried and ran through its every iteration, weeping, sobbing, moping around, because while you were grateful, you knew that you'd never be able to repay Cillian for this grand act of kindness. When you decided you were finally able to see him without bursting into tears, you figured the least you could do to show your appreciation was purchase him something from his favorite cafe.

You didn't want to ruin the surprise, so you scrolled through your contacts until you found someone you hadn't talked with since graduating secondary school. Cillian's mother quickly responded, sending you their address. Inputting it into an online map, you were pleasantly surprised to discover that he lived within walking distance. The true shock came when you finally arrived at his house.

You only recalled that stout, faded brick building on the same street as yours. You hadn't visited Cillian after he moved households, and now, as you stared at the grand structure, felt a pang of envy and rage, the latter at how he'd kept his luxurious lifestyle hidden. Suddenly, you felt insecure about offering a measly cake in thanks.

Nevertheless, you steeled your nerves and approached, not minding how an elderly neighbor eyed you with suspicion. Before knocking on the door, you pressed your collar down and smoothed your skirt. Your palms felt sweaty as you grabbed the knocker and released it, allowing it to pummel the door. Almost as if they'd been waiting, someone instantly opened it. She had the same set of eyes and shaped lips. She didn't quite have the same jaw or the same nose, but otherwise, she was the spitting image of Cillian.

"Y/N!" She pulled you into an embrace, quickly pulling away to tuck flyaway strands behind your ears. "It's so nice to see you again! Cillian's been looking forward to your visit all day."

You blinked, certain you'd told her your visit was intended as a surprise. "Thanks? Are you alright?"

Nodding, she seized your shoulders and ushered you inside, using a tender force to push you through the hallway and into the living room. In her haste, she jostled you around. The cake you'd packed to snack on jostled around in your arms. You stumbled into the foyer, gawking as she slammed the door shut.

Left alone, you traced each crystal hanging from the chandelier on the ceiling, the expensive decor. You hadn't been to Cillian's house since his family 'made it,' and now, you understood why. Cillian must've known that, instead of feeling comfort or recalling a fond memory from your childhood, you'd only feel like you didn't belong.

Another voice stirred the silence, somewhat warming you.

"What are you doing here?"

"Lee," you started, relieved at the sight of him. "Hey! I thought you would like this." You lifted the take-out bag to display the contents, but he tilted his head. "Got it from that cafe you love." 

"Why did you come here?" he bluntly asked.

Smile faltering, you stumbled over your words. "Do I need a reason?"

"Not at all," he breezily said. "It’s just… Nothing. Never mind. I'm happy you're here." Cillian stepped forward, and in the light you could see how his hair wasn't yet dried, causing his green locks to appear darker than they should be. "What happened?"

You half-heartedly smiled at him. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his pants. Even when he was dressed casually, with a simple black shirt and sweatpants, he eluded beauty and grace. You would have barely recognized that those were his home clothes. 

"I just brought you a cake to say thanks," you dryly said. "You still fine with me staying? Or should I leave?"

"Why would you leave?" Cillian marched towards you, seizing the bag. Then, setting it aside on the couch, he swept you into his arms. "I'd have to be insane to pass up time with my girl."

Shrieking, you laugh and beg him to put you down. When had he gotten so strong? He lifts you as if you're nothing, going against your wishes and spinning around, causing you to feel vertigo.

What had caused his spontaneous nature today? Usually, Cillian was stiff-faced and severe, dutifully maintaining his image. You didn't know, but you were pleasantly surprised by this hidden playful side. And of course, by how strong he was. Thrown over his shoulder, you felt some muscles you hadn't noticed before. You felt him moving, propelling you to some unknown destination, trailing down a long hall lined with dark oak tiles.

He tossed you onto his bed. Silky sheets billowed around you, temporarily engulfing the world. When they fell back against the mattress, you were startled to find Cillian kneeling over you, arms caging you in on either side.

"Hi," you stuttered, startled by his handsomeness at such proximity.

"Hi," he responded.

You counted the moments with each thud of your heart against your ribcage. One, two, three anxious flutters, then his lips were on yours, ravenous as he siphoned the breath from your lungs. Mind on overdrive, you tried returning his zeal, grabbing his collar for leverage. Your body tingled, but you ignored the strange pit forming in your stomach. Cillian's desires weren't odd. Neither was him acting on them. He was your boyfriend. You were going to have to get used to this sooner or later.

That was what you told yourself, but when his hand crept from your waist to the waistband of your jeans, you felt a sudden jolt of panic and seized his wrist, sheepishly grinning. When he looked up, his eyes lacked their usual sheen. Gulping, you quickly tried to set things straight. It wasn't that you didn't want him, too. Only...

"You don't think it's too soon?" You whispered, refusing to meet his gaze. "I mean… We barely started dating. I don't know if—"

He answered your question with one of his own, sharply and slightly defensive. Huffing, "You trust me, don’t you?"

"Of course," you instantly confirmed, feeling your heart stutter.

"So just trust the timing," he replied, toying with the hem of your shirt. "It'd make me happy if you’ll just be good. I want us to enjoy each other."

The bedroom, dimly lit by the soft glow of a single bedside lamp, seemed to pulse with an electric charge as he guided you into his embrace. His lips crushed down on yours, devouring your mouth in a hungry kiss. His tongue dominated yours, stilling your breath as he explored your mouth. Meanwhile, his hands roamed beneath your shirt, thumbs encircling your nipples.

"Please," you panted, head falling back to reveal more of your neck, abandoning any vestiges of shame. Your hands slipped into his hair, holding him against you. "Touch me."

He murmured in agreement, his breath hot against your skin and he undressed you painfully slow, pausing between articles to press open-mouthed kisses to the newly barred flesh. The soft rustle of fabric and the sound of your breath hitched in your throat filled the room as Cillian finally stripped you bare, save for your underwear. The glasses, he let you keep, too. He wanted you to see him.

"Do you want me to show you what to do?" He asked, his voice low and smooth. "Or do you want me to make you feel good first?"

Yuqing hesitated, her glasses slipping down her nose as she nervously met his gaze. That need to please him, to maintain the love she cherished, gnawed at her. But there was another truth, one she couldn't keep hidden any longer.

"I—I should tell you," you stammered, your eyes darting around the room, seeking something else to help anchor you to the moment. "You're not... you're not the first person I've been with. The first time wasn't that great, but I trust—"

The tension in the room tightened like a coiled snake as Cillian's expression faltered. His jaw clenched, and his eyes darkened with an emotion that seemed to swim between hurt and anger. A silent storm raged behind his eyes as he processed her words, his initial shock quickly turning into a seething jealousy. The air in the room thickened, charged with tension as if a thunderstorm loomed overhead.

"What do you mean?" he demanded, his grip on your wrist tightening slightly.

"I've been with someone else before," you sheepishly admitted, quivering under the intensity of his stare.

"Is that so?" His face contorted with possessiveness. "Then let me try something first to see how he ruined you."

Sharply inhaling, you decided to take the plunge. Nodding, you stared at the ceiling, releasing an anxious huff when Cillian's pried your knees apart. Smoothly, he positioned himself between your legs. He tilted his head, nipping at her inner thigh. You felt a gust of warm breath and shivered as his teeth grazed your tender skin. Desperate for him, your hands threading through his hair, guiding him where you wanted him most. But Cillian was in control, and he resisted your attempt to direct him.

"Cillian," you choked out, voice wavering. "I've never done this. It feels weird."

"You'll be fine," he murmured. Hooking his fingers around the side of your panties, he tugged them off your hips, discarding the pair onto his bedside table. "I need to make sure your pretty little pussy is ready to take me."

His kisses trailed higher, over your hips, then back down the insides of your thighs. You whimpered at the lack of attention, and Cillian's eyes locked with yours, a devilish glint in his gaze. Finally, without warning, he lowered his head, his tongue flicking over your clit. You threaded your fingers through the sheets as he sucked and licked, an arm resting across your hips to keep you where he wanted, while the fingers on his other hand spread you open, allowing him to delve deeper.

Cillian whimpered and groaned, mindlessly muttering praise as he devoured you. Your hips bucked, grinding against his face, desperate to feel more, but Cillian took his time, exploring your hole with his tongue before pulling away with a raunchy smack. Lips glistening, he greeted you with a smile. You frowned, displeased at the lack of attention, but he didn't seem keen to allow that expression to remain for long.

"Ready, baby?"

Breathless, you began, "Ready for—"

His head dropped back between your legs. His mouth reattached to your clit. Groaning against you, Cillian inserted a finger into your tight hole, slowly easing you open, scissoring and curling agonizingly slow while he continued to suck and lick your clit, not even stopping while your legs began to quiver around his head. If anything, your reactions spurred his frenzy. He moaned against you, the vibrations sending you higher. He added a second finger, stretching her further, his tongue never ceasing its magic.

Cillian continued pounding his fingers into you, scissoring and curling until you released a moan, announcing that he'd found that spot that had you seeing stars with every thrust. Your mind was lost, your body convulsing as your release flowed over his fingers and mouth.

"That’s it, love," Cillian praised, his fingers never ceasing their motion, milking every last drop of pleasure from you. Grabbing your legs, Cillian tugged you back down so you were facing him. Momentarily, you were face to face with his wide smile. The sight of the lower half of his face glistening with your slickness caused a wave of embarrassment to wash over you. "Silly girl. I'm not done with you just yet."

"What do you mean?" You asked, your eyes widening as you felt his hard member pressing against your thigh.

"Need to feel that sweet cunt around my cock," Cillian said, positioning himself at your entrance. Teasingly, he rubbed the tip against the hole.

"Lee," you moaned. "Too sensitive. Let me suck you for now."

Too focused on your studies, you hadn't been with someone in such a long time. All of the attention he was giving you was overwhelming, touching you so eagerly, and in ways you'd never before experienced.

Instead of jumping at the offer, Cillian glared. "Did he teach you how to do that?" he demanded.

Meekly, you shook your head. "Wanna make you feel good, too."

Expression returning to his signature smile, he pressed his lips against yours. You tasted the remnants of yourself on him, saw yourself reflecting in his love-struck eyes. You'd never felt so desired. So wanted. He was desperate to have you, and you were ready to give and do anything for him in return.

"We can get to that later," he said. "For now, you'll take what I give you. Need to make you forget anyone else."

In your dazed state, it took you a moment to realize who he was talking about. When you realized, you flinched, a blush creeping up your cheeks at the memory. Cillian noticed your expression, and his nails pressed into the plump flesh of your thighs.

You whined, hips futilely rising to meet his. "Keep going, Lee. Please. Need you so bad."

You hoped your pleas would spur his hips into motion, but he continued, slopping thrusting into you. The lack of friction was driving you insane. Biting your lip, you permitted his teasing ministrations. Whatever jealous streak Cillian was going through, you'd just have to permit.

"But I need to know," he insisted, suddenly picking up the pace. He punctuated each word with a sharp snap of his hips, pounding into you. "I need to know everything he did to this so I can do it better and make you forget him completely."

"His name was…" you began, the words catching in your throat as he dragged his thick cock against your walls, slamming into a spot that had you seeing stars. "Cillian!" You cried out, legs wrapping around his waist. You relented your grip on the sheets in favor of digging your nails into his skins

"Good girl, marking me up." Cillian's jaw clenched, but his hips continued moving at their languid pace, almost as if he were torturing you. "You're driving me crazy. So good for me." Save for his soft grunts and your moans, the only sounds filling the room was your sweat-slick skin against his as he picked up the pace, growing more frantic and rough as he chased his release. His voice grew less coherent with every thrust. "Gonna be my perfect girl and let me finish inside?" He pleaded, mouth falling to the crook of your neck, teeth sinking in. "Please, love. Wanna see my pretty doll stuffed with my cum. Wanna see it dripping out of you."

 Feeling a coil in your stomach, you squirmed, but he kept you pinned beneath him with a bruising hold, keeping you flush against him as thick, warm ropes of cum flooded your pussy. Vision blurred and mind suddenly clearer than ever, you lay there, staring at the clock against the wall as the room swam in and out of focus. Your body was a confusing mix of sensations, sore, yet strangely satisfied. With the sun dipping on the horizon, pale sunlight filtered through the curtains, casting eerie shadows.

You tried to move, but Cillian merely whined and pulled out, watching his cum spill out. He tried to scoop some up and prod your hole, but you hissed in protest, sharing your exhaustion. Almost mournfully, he relented: he had left no part of you untouched and still seemed keen to explore some more. Even then, he held fast to you, fingers tracing idle circles on your side, brushing aside the sweat-slick strands of your hair so he could view the marks he'd left on your neck.

You tried to ignore the tingling sensation where he had marked you and the numbness of your legs as he pulled you closer until your back was flush against his chest. Feeling his still-hard cock against your back, you couldn't help but shiver.

"Y/N," Cillian murmured, his voice suddenly tinged with a hint of remorse. It took you aback. You tried to turn and face him, but with a hand pressing down on your hip, he held you firmly in place. "I'm sorry if I acted odd. I just... I love you, you know? Always have. I just hate knowing that I didn't get to have you first. I don't like the idea of anyone else having you at all." He pressed a chaste kiss against your shoulder blade. You felt him rub his cock against you, felt him kneading the flesh of your ass. "So can I be the first to have you here?"

As you stared into Cillian's eyes, you felt the icy tendrils of your own destruction beginning to take root. You were thankful for everything he'd done so far, so it couldn't hurt...

It would, but you'd push through the pain with him wiping your tears, whispering sweet nothings as you finally gave him something no one else would ever steal from him, something that only he alone would have the chance to cherish.

this was my first time actually writing smut instead of only implying it so i'm sorry if it seems rushed/awkward/scattered 😅

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

Trip: knight!price x princes!reader

Idk if this should be a warning but there's like a tin y bit of a mention of religion but like not that much. Also it's the fantasy middle ages unfortunately it's a topic that has to come up. Also another long chapter, sorry lol

It was early in the morning when Sir John Price had come to you and asked if you wanted to take a trip with him for the day. He didn't have to tell you what it was exactly at the time, you just agreed and before long you were sitting on your horse with Pride riding next to you.

Only a few hours had passed and the countryside had taken over as you continued down the road with him.

He had yet to tell you where you were going or why.

"Are you taking me hunting?" You wondered and he shook his head with a small smile.

"I'd be foolish to do that, your highness." He said and you hummed.

"Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise."

You sighed but smiled and allowed him to lead you wherever he wished. You trusted him and you recognized that you were heading the direction towards the nearby village.

It had been awhile since you had been beyond the village and the fields surrounding the castle since your mother made it known you were supposed to stay close by for any suitors. You hadn't realized how trapped you felt until you were out of her shadow.

If you were being honest, this would be enough to keep you happy if Price had nothing else to show you.

"You're not worried about any unwanted attention I might bring?" You teased when you remembered how wary he'd been the other time you made an appearance in a village.

"You're far too stubborn to keep hidden." He teased back. "We won't be in the village much today."

You tilted your head but he didn't elaborate and only gave you a small smile that made you playfully narrow your eyes at him.

Regardless, you follow him into the village and greeted any villagers you passed on the way in before you followed him towards the outskirts. It was then that you realized he was leading you towards the monastery that sat on the top of the hill.

"Are you turning in your sword?" You wondered and he raised an eyebrow. "Have a I worn you out already?"

"No, your highness," Price scoffed as he stopped his horse in front of the monastery. "You know I'm not a praying man."

Price helped you down from your horse and you chuckled at the thought of him praying as often as the monks do.

"No, you are hardly devout enough for that."

"Not to God, at least."

Price let you enter first and you stared in awe at the stained glass that captured the late morning sun. You had visited a few times before but the peaceful silence and the architecture never failed to amaze you.

It wasn't long before a monk met the both of you and bowed before Price spoke.

"If it's not trouble to you, the princess would like to take a few books back to the castle with her in exchange for some that she already has."

Your eyes widened and you snapped your head towards him. You couldn't help the way that your heart skipped a beat as the monk gestured towards the stairs.

Price sucked in his lips when he saw your surprise and he bowed his head slightly.

"You said you needed more book to read."

You shouldn't have been surprised that he would take a passing comment so seriously. If Sir John was anything he was attentive about everything around him, including something so small as more books to entertain you with.

It made your heart soar and you body warm up. You wanted tot hank him but you couldn't find your voice but you feared you'd sound choked up because you could feel your throat tighten.

He cleared he throat and gestured towards the stairs.

"Shall we?"

Upstairs there were rows and rows of shelves full of books. Many of them you hadn't seen before which nearly captivated your attention immediately. Excitement bubbled up inside of you as you browsed them knowing that you could spend days looking through all of them.

Price carried any of the books you picked out even when you tried to protest but he did it anyway.

"You should pick out a few as well. I haven't forgotten my promise."

"There's no way for me to know I will like them."

"Then tell me what you like and I'll get it for you."

As you worked through the books and picked out a few that fit what he would like your mind wandered. You remembered what he told you about his upbringing but you want to know more.

You never would've guess him to be anything but noble born despite his more rugged personality than most knights.

"You're from the north, correct?" You wondered softly and he raised an eyebrow.

"Only a weeks ride from the castle." He explained. "It's a lot more country up there."

"Do you miss it?"

"Often."

You frowned. In reality, he was never meant to be far from his home. If the lord hadn't taken him in, he would've stayed there and enjoyed his life without the expectations of keeping the crown and the kingdom safe. He wouldn't know you personally, you doubt he would've ever seen you.

You hoped that he didn't regret becoming a knight, especially since you didn't make it very easy for him.

"Tell me more." You looked at him almost pleadingly and his eyebrows knitted together.

He hesitated only for a moment as he studied you carefully before he looked deep in thought.

"I lived on the lord's land. We were farmers. My house was just on the edge of the woods and I'd spend most of my time in there when I wanted to avoid doing any work...it was peaceful." His voice was calm as he reminisced and you giggled softly. "Then when the lord took me in I lived in his estate. At the time it was the biggest home I'd been in and I was put off by it."

"It sounds like you're still fond of it." You said and he nodded.

"The lord named me his heir before he passed, so I own everything including my old home."

You smiled at that but the question in your mind slowly took it away. You knew the answer but you wanted to ask just in case you were mistaken.

"And your parents?"

"They pass when I was young. They were very sick."

"...I'm sorry."

"Thank you, your highness."

Despite the sadness of the situation you were grateful that the lord had taken him in and that you know got to know him, especially as he stared at you with soft eyes that made you warm.

"Would you like to go there someday?" Price's voice was soft and almost unsure as he stared at you with bated breath.

You could see the nervousness in his eyes despite the fact that he stood tall as he always did. But he shifted on his feet and sucked in his lips, wetting them as he waited for you to answer.

And you could hardly keep yourself from looking surprised and flustered.

It was one thing for him to bring you places that you liked and that you would enjoy but it was another for him to want to bring you to somewhere he held dear. It was a privilege to let you see, to get closer to him in ways that you knew you would never get with a lord or a prince.

And you wanted to continue to do it. You wanted to get closer to him, to feel what could be if you weren't who you were.

It would ruined you but you couldn't help it.

"I would." You nodded and watched him sigh with relief.

"Then I will take you one day." He smiled softly and you couldn't hep but return it.

He glanced at the window, his cheeks a light pink before he gestured towards it.

"We still have the day. There's somewhere else I'd like to take you, if you wish, your highness."

You titled your head and watched his eyes twinkle.

"Another monastery?" You tried to guess but he shook his head.

"You'll like it just as much." Price said and you hummed.

You didn't argue. You knew that whatever he had planned would be perfect and that it didn't really matter because he was taking you there anyway.

a/n: I need him in ways that's concerning to everyone

Tags: @deadbranch @makayla-666 @glitterypirateduck @dumbbitchgalore @m0chac0ffee @dragonbe-writing @sleepyoriana @twismare @blush-haze @waiting-so-long @sofasoap @panikk-attackkk

[huevinart]

I’m requesting for some fluffy and romantic Syzoth/reader content lol

Syzoth love at first sight and then getting to know each other (I’m okay with fem reader or GN I’ll leave that up to you. :) )

I hope you like it and thank you very much for the request 🥹🐊💚

Remember that I am accepting requests for Syzoth x f.reader🐊🐊

Syzoth x FemReader (fluffy/romantic)

Syzoth had barely arrived at Earthrealm, having fulfilled his promise to bring Johnny and the others to the portal. He was greeted by Liu Kang who told them to go to the monks, but it was not until then that she appeared. "Lord Liu Kang, do you request my help?" y/n spoke, her voice was the first thing that captivated him, he instinctively directed his gaze towards her, oh my gods, in her eyes she was beautiful, he smiled shyly as he watched and was captivated by every feature of that woman. . beautiful. He never thought that a hot blood would captivate him, but the intrigue and the desire to get closer took over him more and more, it was only two minutes that he saw her, but in her mind they were an eternity.

Unfortunately he had not seen her again, it had been a week since he saw her for the first and only time. She tried to forget him and focused on trying to fit in. She didn't know how long she would have to stay there or if she would ever be able to return home. He felt uncomfortable under the gaze of the monks.

"Don't pay attention to other people's looks, they only judge without knowing" Syzoth had his back turned but he recognized that voice, his heart was racing and he didn't understand, he knew it was her, because he was sweating cold, his stomach seemed like a feast of butterflies, alone He saw her from afar once, what was wrong with her? Why was he embarrassed to look at her? "Are you OK?" he y/n he had spoken again but this time she touched his shoulder, she had touched him and he couldn't react, he felt helpless. "You cast a spell on me!" Syzoth uttered with his cheeks flushed with a greenish tone, but not before realizing his words and covering his face "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, forgive me, I didn't mean to..." looking away quickly but Something made him nervous and he turned his reality around, the laughter of the woman that attracted him so much. She wasn't a mocking laugh, she was tender, almost nervous. "Well, first of all let me introduce myself, my name is Y/n, and from what I was told you must be Syzoth, it's my pleasure" his warm smile was reciprocated "The pleasure is all mine y/n"

"I brought you something, I know you have problems with human food and I also know you ate a bug."

Syzoth just scratches the back of his neck again embarrassed "Johnny..."

Y/n hands him a container with a lid "My duty is to make you feel comfortable, and I thought you would be hungry, I bought this at the market, they are insects, I don't know if you like them or not." ...be careful when you open it, I had a hard time putting them there" her green eyes fixed on her, he had gotten her the food. "You shouldn't have done that y/n, thank you very much."

"Do you mind if I join you for lunch? I want you to feel at home, and by the way, if you don't mind, I'd like to hear stories."

"Doesn't it make you sick to see me eating bugs?"

"Of course not, who knows if I'll eat one too" she winks at him making him notice her little joke and in response Syzoth takes her hand taking her to a quiet place to get to know each other better. The days pass and their routine intertwines their hearts. Lunch together, walks, and late-night talks brought them closer and closer. Syzoth used to pick flowers in the gardens to decorate Y/N's hair.

Kung Lao saw them together once, and it didn't take long for him to tell everyone that a huge lizard was sleeping on Y/n's lap and that in the process he was pampered like a kitten and that he even saw them kiss, which intensified the banter and Johnny's comments. This helped though, since they hadn't actually had their first kiss yet, but they were more than determined that on their next walk they would make the rumors true.

[callofdudes]

König x Autistic Reader headcanons

Just a little disclaimer that I myself am not autistic. I'm neurdivergent but I don't struggle with most of the things that autistic people do. So please feel free to let me know if something is incorrect. Only here to spread love. ♥️

Being the colonel, König heard about you from your previous commanding officer. You were being switched to KorTac on recommendation so he didn't think any less of you when he heard you were also autistic.

Not that he would if you weren't, but you had a pretty decent record to back your few years in the military.

He had less than a week to prepare before you'd be transfered, and he wanted to be as prepared for you as possible. He'd read as much as he could, trying to take everything in.

Of course, hearing that some things were different for different autistic users was a little anxiety inducing.

When he met you out off the helicopter, you had your headphones on, taking them off slowly when you got a comfortable distance from the spinning blades.

He noticed how you took them off slowly, letting yourself adjust a little to the noise out of the headphones before hanging them around your neck.

"Ah, sergeant. My name is König." König held out his gloved hand, which you seemed a little surprised at, but on a good way. And you shook his hand, recognizing his firm grip.

"Thank you..."

"Allow me to show you around before we talk business ja?"

You nodded hesitantly, slowly following him.

Your eyes moved everywhere, taking in the new environment. It was much different. All the new smells, the sounds, the surprise of it.

König was aware you would need proper introduction to the environment. The ins and outs, a clear schedule laid out before it happened. Which is what he would prepare you with. No doubt just chucking you into work would overwhelm you. As it would anyone.

He noticed the way your thumbs continually moved over the seam of your uniform in the same motion while you took everything in.

He laid out the usual schedule, reassuring you that you wouldn't have to adhere to their schedule so strictly until you were fully integrated.

It was nice, how smooth it felt. Unlike your first transition. Being thrown into boot camp with zilch for experience you knew it would be rough. But you're glad you don't ever have to do that again.

König made sure you were aware that you could come to him if you needed anything or if you had questions. He was an open book and willing to help.

At first he was very worried about how you'd react to his mask. He didn't know if you'd be ok with it or not? Would you be put off by it? Would it reassure you with so little detail on his face, not being able to see him.

But from how you reacted, clearly your first impressions of his gentle nature won you over instead of his daunting height and scary exterior.

You had been worried in the beginning that König was going to be like everyone else. But he was actually very gentle. He was quieter, unlike your previous superiors who seemed to be into yelling just because they could.

And König was gentle with you. Not like when you were first brought into the military. Now, to be fair, you had joined the military and they wanted soldiers one way or another. You hadn't expected to be pampered right out of the gate. But he approached you in a way that settled you in.

König was usually very aware of what he was doing, because of his height and his position, every move was in his thoughts. And with you that was no different.

"Hey... Y/n, I know the canteen is pretty busy today, so I figured I'd just bring you a plate here." He smiles a little under the hood, wondering if you'd appreciate the gesture or get mad at him because you thought he was treating you as weak.

To his relief, you smiled softly. "Oh, König-" you pause when you saw the plate. König had always noticed you much preferred some food over others, and you always organized them in specific ways. And it was just like that, your plate perfect to your autistic eye.

You wouldn't have to spend ten minutes of precious food time reordering and sorting.

"Thank you König, thank you."

König always did his best to help you. But of course, there was only so much he could do to help. Even in simple training, you were sometimes allowed to have your headphones on, but there was always that time when you weren't.

When könig would clearly see you getting overwhelmed from smells, sounds, and strenuous activity you were faced with.

König is always an extended arm, but was nervous to help you if you didn't want it. So when you showed up in his office, clearly something wrong he wasn't sure what to do.

You just stood in the doorway, clutching the hem of your shirt, your throat feeling tight. You couldn't move, just on the brink of completely exploding in tears.

König slowly stood, approaching you gently. "Y/n..?" He reached out to touch you, slowly, giving you a moment to pull away if you wanted. But you didn't. His hand touching your cheek, cupping your face.

"You're doing amazing..."

Tears fell down your cheeks and you whimpered, leaning against him. He gently wrapping his other arm around you. Warming you, slowly rubbing your back in consistent circles.

"I'm here. I'm here y/n."

König soon became used to knowing every little motion to you. Your hands tensing, trying to stim with them, struggling with verbal communication in stressful situations, or at all. Getting the words in your head out verbally usually a struggle.

Whenever you needed him, he'd be there. On missions when stuck in a stake out, he would give you his backpack that hopefully it would provide enough weight when he took watch; so you could sleep with minimal anxiety.

But König knew, and he was patient.

König who let's you stim with the Velcro straps on his gear and uniform whenever you needed it.

You two were sitting in the cargo plane, könig could feel you staring into him. Your hand moved a little, and he looked at you. "Y/n??"

"König... Can I..?" You reached your hand for his belt, and he understood. Pulling the Velcro from his belt and moving it to your hand. "Yeah, go ahead."

You nod, pushing the Velcro apart and then slowly pulling it open. Listening to the sound and the slow tear. And the patch on his bicep, listening to it slowly peal apart and then sticking it evenly back on.

König sat there still, letting you stim. "Feeling a bit better?"

You nod a little. "Yeah... Thank you."

He hums, smiling softly. He let's you play with the Velcro for the remainder of the flight, not minding you gently stimming with his gear. It's calming for him in a way as well.

When you were on base, you one time asked for him to lay on you, and he was genuinely afraid he'd hurt you.

"Y/n... I believe I am a tad too heavy. I can get you something else-?"

"No König. Crush me. Crush me like my soul... Suffocate me into happiness.."

"Woah... Alright then."

You laid on your back with your arms flat open invitingly. And so König laid across you, wrapping his arms around your waist and placing his palms up between your shoulder blades.

You sighed happily as he squeezed the oxygen out of you, pushing you down into the blanket. He was warm, his smell was familiar.

"Perfect..."

König who asks if you have any favorite scents from back home, or any in general. The ones he likes he gets you scented candles so you can put them in your office and room for comfort.

König who buys you a white noise machine and sends you audio files of crickets and whales.

And your hyperfixations. Oh König loves them. He loves listening to you talking his ear off. He doesn't talk a whole lot and enjoys the silence, so having you who dominates the conversation, but not in a way where he feels overstepped or ignored. It's nice.

He loves hearing about all the lore and the background for your liking said thing.

And he even decided to try sharing an interest of his to you. Nature documentaries! König was happy when you gave it a try. If you can sit still through all of it, great! If you can't, he'll probably dig out a fidget toy or grabs something nearly you can use.

Gets rubix cubes from Horangi to see if you like it and want it. Found out what a fidget spinner is and got you one too.

When you told him you were nervous of what the others would think of you carrying one around base, König made the bold decision to carry one too. "Hey, how about we both carry one? So then you're not alone, and they won't think you're weird!"

König is very protective of him. You're like his kid! But in a cool way, not a demeaning way. He wants to take care of you and protect you as best he can. He wants you to know he's got your back.

He's there when you need someone to lay on, or to be laid on. He's there when you need someone who will just cup your ears and tell you to focus on him.

He's there when you need someone to wipe those tears and hold you close to a warm, welcoming body of a close friend.

Because he's your friend, and he cares so much for you. He's definitely still learning, and still trying, but damn it if he wouldn't do anything it takes for you.

[pretty-toru]

Recently I've been thinking about how Gojo would introduce his non-sorcerer s/o who's completely unaware of cursed spirits and jujutsu sorcery about that part of his life. And he'd maybe start by explaining his blindfold or black-out sunglasses.

I'd like to think that he still sometimes forgets about the small things and shows up at your doorstep in his teacher's uniform paired with his blindfold after a tiresome day of work. You've never really seen him outside of his sunglasses and casual attire and Gojo has kept the details of his profession hidden from you for good reason. Now he's less careful about his appearance since he feels ready to reveal more about himself that's "otherworldly".

Besides, Gojo thinks that it's easier to break the news about how he's part of the Big Three Clans, inherited this special pair of Six Eyes, and he's the Strongest Sorcerer who exorcises curses for a living AFTER you've fallen so hopelessly in love with him that you'll choose to stay with him no matter. (You'd probably flat-out reject him if you knew from the beginning).

So when you answer the door doing a once over of a strange and tall man dressed in dark clothing with his eyes covered sporting a wide grin upon seeing you, you're almost wary as you keep the door open enough just to see out.

"...Can I help you?"

"I've had a long day, sweetheart. Aren't you going to let me in?"

"???" "Sorry? But who are you?"

"Ah, right right. Gimme one second." Gojo then removes the cloth obscuring his eyes and his soft white hair cascades over his forehead as he switches to his sunglasses and you suddenly realize that the stranger is indeed your boyfriend. "You know, I'm actually hurt you didn't recognize me because I'd know you anywhere, angel."

You're dumbfounded as you lower your guard and Gojo enters your apartment and places a kiss on your pretty lips, commenting about how something smells amazing and asks what's cooking for dinner while he unzips his outerwear and tosses it on your couch. But you're still dazed about what just happened and it felt too weird to simply gloss over the fact. "Hang on, aren't we going to talk about what just happened?"

"Hm? Talk about what?" Gojo feigns perfect innocence, making his sweet way to your cabinets and drawers to retrieve two plates and utensils after observing the table hadn't been set yet.

"Your blindfold? And what you're wearing?" Your hand is placed firmly on your hip with a skewed expression, gesturing the wooden spoon in your grip that was used to stir the pot of beef stew at him.

"It's my work uniform. The blindfold is part of it."

"I'm confused, I thought you were a teacher? How are you able to see in that?"

"I'll tell you all about it once I have some of your delicious food in me, okay hun?" Gojo's quick in his stride to set the dishes in their rightful places before he's gently cooing your suspicions away and leading you back into the kitchen with his hand on the small of your back. "C'mon I'll help you finish dinner then I'll answer your questions. I promise you."

You deflate with a sigh. "...Okay."

After enjoying dinner, Gojo helps you clear the table and with all the promises he makes to you he earnestly keeps. He's quite sure you'll come up with more questions than you already have as he's slowly but surely eases you into his world as a shaman — his way of telling you that he’s serious about you. Gojo loves and trusts you enough to reveal all the parts of himself to you in due time, and he can only hope that you'll wholeheartedly accept him in his entirety.

[separatist-apologist]

At this point I just like your posts with just skimming through it because I know your big, mature brain won't let me down with your opinions

And I need people know sjm is NOT a good writer lol. Just because she's famous doesn't mean she's the best one out there. Acotar is a missed opportunity at best. And most people who are hard-core fan of these book thinks these books are perfect and not because sjm keep retconing and changing and forgetting her own goddamn plot so they take everything for what it is. I've seen people criticised Mor and Feyre for leaving some dreamers at CoN and they don't care about them. No babes sjm just forgot about it all fkn together!!!

Okay I have thoughts about this. I'm once again slapping it under a cut just because its long. These are just my thoughts, feel free to disagree

There is nothing wrong, just to be clear, with SJM being a person's favorite writer. I think she is an entertaining writer and I think begrudgingly everyone in this fandom needs to admit that. I think she creates very interesting characters and places that people want to know more about and her writing is very accessible which feels like a burn but I swear isn't.

I don't think she's a bad writer, personally, but I do think she's just not interested in her own details or worlds the way her fans are, and I think this is true across every book series she's written. I think her problem is she writes the way I do- she knows how her stories end, she has a few key scenes in mind, and she figures the rest out as she goes.

This felt pretty evident in TOG, too- you could watch in real-time as her plots changed and she undid things it felt like she'd been building toward. ACOTAR isn't any better in that regard because I GENUINELY do not think she knew what she was doing plotwise when she started the series and it came to her as she went which is why the whole Amarantha things feels so ?????????

Even in TOG, SJM is not interested in the political maneuverings of her characters, the governing process, her political landscape or ANY of the things that a lot of people get frustrated by, to circle to your CoN plot. I think she relies very heavily on "x says they care and I'm telling you they're a good person, so the assumption is they're also a good ruler and we don't need to explore that any further". SJM drops these little pieces of lore like about Mor's cousins or the women of Illyria or whatever and then doesn't do anything with it or even recognize, in my opinion, the conclusions her readers are drawing.

And I think its because to her, she's told you what you need to know. Rhys is a GOOD ruler because the people of Velaris love him AND because she tells us so. Tamlin is a bad ruler because he exacts taxes on his decimated population AND she tells us so. And when people examine those statements, it starts to crumble, in my opinion, which is why I think people get defensive. They don't CARE about the political workings of this world, they just want to read about hot people doing hot people shenanigans.

I do think that going to a SJM book for thoughtful worldbuilding and an interesting magic/political system is a mistake. Having read every series she's ever written, I do not think this is her strong suit and I'm tired of being told I only think so because of internalized misogyny. I think SJM is a good character writer- her characters are compelling, and even anti's typically have a favorite character they wish had been better fleshed out or had been done more with or would be better explored in future books.

This is all over the place- I'm just writing my thoughts as they come to me. Ultimately, I think SJM's books typically don't stand up to heavy scrutiny and that depending on what you're looking for in a book, you're going to come away with different levels of enjoyment. For me, I hadn't read anything fiction in like, six years because I'd been knee deep in academia and it was the first thing I read just for fun and it WAS fun. It IS fun, even now. It's a brain off read. For better or worse, ACOTAR isn't complicated or hard to understand- SJM tells her readers what to think AND feel all the time, so you don't really need to think about any of it.

But when you read other fantasy in her genre, it becomes clear that like...oh. This is just mediocre. In some places it feels like a poor retelling of other stories (TOG has HEAVY LOTR moments, for example) and thoughtless culture stealing that feels offensive in places (CC feels especially bad in this regard given how she's stitched together like, 3-5 different cultures without a good understanding of any of them).

I'm not saying anti's shouldn't still discuss their issues with it. But I will say that if you're looking for a well fleshed out world and a political system that is interesting to read and characters who are consistent and don't bow to the whims of the author and plot, you're probably going to have a hard time with ALL of SJM.

[la-principessa-nuova]

For the longest time I was aware that if someone else were in my shoes, I would suggest that they try therapy, but I didn't take my own advice.

I felt like, since I was pretty aware of what was going on in my head, and I knew a fair amount about psychology, that it could really do anything for me.

I figured I'd end up talking to someone who knew the same things I did but lacked the context of my own brain and gave bad advice, and it would get me nowhere.

It turns out I was very wrong about that.

I've now been in therapy for 6½ months, and it is helping me so much. I am in such a better place, feeling more in control of my life, and more clear-headed because of therapy.

Even though a lot of the revelations are things I've realized before, having someone else point them out to me makes it a lot easier to recognize them for being an issue and to give myself permission to do the things needed to fix them.

And all the things where I go, "Yeah, X is a problem, and doing Y would fix it, but... you know..." and everyone in my life goes, "yeah, you can't really do Y...," and my therapist is like, "Why can't you do Y?" and then I think about it throughout the week and then I do Y and my life gets 150% better.

Also just conveying information about past things to another person kind of forces you to get the information in order, and when that other person also knows exactly which questions to ask, you can end up remembering things you hadn't thought of in years.

I could go on more, but I don't feel like it, so just go get therapy if you are putting it off.

If you're worried about getting a bad therapist, that's a very valid concern. I probably got very lucky getting a very good therapist that is a good fit for me on first try, but here's what I did to increase the odds:

I went on Psychology Today and put in my location.

I then used the breadcrumbs at the top of the page to go back up to the state level. Since I was looking to do therapy online, I didn't care about them being close, just licensed in my state, but even if you're looking for in person, go up to the highest level you're willing to travel to.

I filtered by the specialties relevant to me.

I filtered to those who work with adults (since I am one), Online (as opposed to In Person), and are currently accepting new patients (Available).

At this point a lot of the descriptions sounded like a bad fit, and for a while I was overwhelmed by the search and put off reaching out to anybody, but then I had an idea: I only needed to find 1 good fit amidst all the bad fits, even if it meant filtering out some good fits. So I filtered it down to only Nonbinary Therapists, who are more likely to have an inclusive understanding of gender. Find something similar if this filter doesn't apply to what you're seeing a therapist for.

This left me with very few therapists. I read their descriptions to see if they were a good fit.

In the description, I looked for whether their tone sounded like someone I would get along with and respect the opinion of, whether they seemed like they would have an up-to-date understanding of neurodivergence, and whether it seemed like they were actually an expert in the specialties I selected, versus just listing everything under the sun. Avoid the ones that list everything at all costs.

Finally I tried reaching out to a therapist. The first one I reached out to never responded, so after waiting a week, I reached out to another therapist, who did respond and set up an initial consultation call.

I was so nervous with the initial consultation call, but I got through it and it seemed like a good fit. If it doesn't, try a different one.

Also if you are neurodivergent, I highly recommend finding a neurodivergent therapist, especially one with the same neurotype as you. It makes it much easier to accept difficult-to-accept things when you can't make the excuse that they just don't know what it's like. Plus just having more things in common makes it way easier to explain things since you have more common ground to build explanations or analogies off of.

[sunandflame]

Flame and Water, Chapter 3

Summary: You are the Water Pillars Tsuguko and for some reason you are terrified of the Flame Pillar. Kyojuro x Fem!Reader

Warnings: burns, fire

Word Count: 743

Masterlist of Flame and Water

"Let's sit down and talk first."

You didn't know how these words made you feel. As well the strong grip of his hand around your wrist. Yes, you could maybe fight him, but what good would that do? You weren't even remotely as strong as he was, he'd proved that earlier and you were not dumb. The only option to get out of there was to comply with his request.

"Okay" Was your answer and he made you follow him to sit on the engawa. He still refused to let go of your and looked stern into your face. "You won't run away if I let go of you now, right?" That was actually your plan, but something inside you said he wouldn't be so forgiving this time as he would just catch you again, so you just shook your head in affirmation. "Alright!" He let go and you immediately felt the cold breeze on your wrist. You hadn't even noticed how warm his touch had actually been. He generally radiated a very warm energy as if his core was flaming in fire.

Both of you sat there now and none of you said a word. The silence was oppressive, since you didn't know what to say or what he expected from you. After all it was him who wanted to talk to you, so he should start the conversation, right?

But what you didn't know was that Kyojuro himself was now overwhelmed with the situation. He had been waiting for days to talk to you, now he had you where he wanted and now he didn't knew how to start it. So he shouted your name. "Y/N!" You inevitably flinched. "Yes...?" Your voice was the opposite of his. Quiet and hesitant. He noticed how you flinched and made a mental note speak a little more restrained. "Y/n I'd like to know if I wronged you"

Your gaze was lowered to the ground, your fists gripped the hem of your haori. What kind of answer did he expect from you? You knew from yourself how unfounded and stupid your fear towards him was and yet you couldn't stop shaking and fleeing at the sight of him. "No..." Was the only thing you could get out and you heard Rengoku sigh deeply next to you "Then why do you keep running away? Why are you so afraid of me?"

Was it that obvious? Where you like an open book? No... No, it can't be that. You were even more reserved than Giyuu probably. Maybe, you thought to yourself, just maybe you have to change that? You opened your mouth, but nothing came out. You felt the fear tighten in your throat and your hands started shaking again. What was the matter with you?! You were a Demon Slayer! Though no longer a Tsuguko, but you were still of high rank and you had killed many demons that were more terrifying! So why were you so scared? You fidgeted with your hands to hide the trembling, when suddenly you heard Rengoku turn to you and take your hands gently in his own. You realized how big his hands were and you looked up into his eyes. His eyes and smile were warm and gentle, as were his hands. "It's okay, don't be afraid"

His red golden eyes, like flames stared to you and brought back a memory you had been successfully suppressing. Until now. And suddenly you felt hot. Very hot. As if you were standing in a sea of flames. The air was stuffy and you start coughing. Your vision was distorted and you recognize a person whose hair resembled fire, even what he wore looked like flames. He saw you with his red golden eyes in which was a fire. Everything around you were burning and you felt the heat on your lower body, screaming was pointless as the pain had taken over just to make you unconscious. As soon as you regained consciousness you knew something bad had been done to you. That someone did something bad to you. Caused you pain because your little child's body was bandaged from top to bottom. Your skin was 40% burned as that was what the nurses around you were talking about. They also talked about other stuff that your child brain couldn’t comprehend at that moment, but you were certain of one thing. You knew that the flame man had done this to you...

🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥

Oh.. What have I done to Y/N... Well we will see how she snaps out of her flashback and if she gonna tell Kyojuro...

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